Standing Up

Sometimes I feel that I will never laugh or love again. The husband whom I shared my life with is gone and one part of my heart seems to have died with him. I am moving on so slowly that sometimes it seems I am not making progress at all. Sometimes I am able to laugh happily, sometimes I am just reduced to a crying heap. I was such a happy person in the past cos I felt that no matter how the world treats me, I will always have my hubby, my rock to turn to.
Now hubby is gone, his heart is with another person, no more with me. I have learnt to stand strong and find my comfort in the friend whom I have long forgotten about. He welcomes me with open arms but because we have not talked for a long time, i feel unfamiliar in his presence, sometimes I can only kneel down and cry before Him. I know He is trying to tell me that things will eventually be ok and that His love is more than enough for me, but I still feel that some days just stretch too long and my tears too hard to bear.
I know that everyday I am getting better, everyday my heart heals a little bit. Somedays I think of hubby, some days I do not. I don't know what life has in store for me but I know who holds my hand.